I feel compelled.
I have to complete an ethics quiz to be allowed do my research, but I don’t think this says what IRB means it to say: “Only qualified scientists must conduct research.”
Now of course I’m pretty sure they intend this to mean that research must only be conducted by qualified research scientists — there are to be no amateurs with clipboards in the lab. What it actually says, though, is that only those individuals who are qualified scientists are compelled to conduct research. Carpenters, plumbers, lawyers, and poets are free to conduct research at their discretion.
So in the elitist, pedantic spirit of the original rule I propose my own: Only qualified linguists may compose sentences. It’s every bit as full of shit as the original, but at least I got the modal right.
no electrodes on the baby.
jen issued her first rule about the baby today.
she looked across the dinner table at me
very seriously
I was talking about language acquisition and babies
and experiments
she had this flash of recognition and said
“no electrodes on the baby!”, and started wagging her finger at me.
I laughed nervously, waiting for the grin.
Jen, not laughing, repeated “none!”
She was dead serious.
I’m not sure if I’m more disturbed by the fact that she was seriously worried that I would put electrodes on our precious baby or that her rule slightly changes my plans for the first three months.
I’m not sure how else I’m supposed to get ERP data.